Parenting. Is. Hard.
Quite honestly, we know it shouldn’t and doesn’t have to be done alone. Years ago, it seems we had a tighter sense of community where raising a baby was done ‘together’. Things are different now, and there can be the societal pressure that if you reach out for support you are not ‘coping’ as a parent. Sadly, this leaves so many parents feeling they are unable to reach out for support (in whatever way, shape, or form, this looks like) so are left parenting alone.
Parenting is hard which is why it is so important that you make time for yourself. It is easy to say and a little less easy to put into place, however, we promise that you will feel so much better for it. Time for yourself doesn’t have to be extravagant or expensive. Perhaps it’s an evening walk once a week with a friend, a weekly gym session, or a monthly massage, whatever it may be that allows you to fill up your cup, please put these dates in the diary and see it as a necessity! Self-care is and should be a necessity, none of us can pour from an empty cup.
In this crazy busy world, find your ‘community’. Find those friends that check in with you on the days you are quiet, those friends that drop off a hot coffee at your door because you’ve had a tough night, the ones that are up for an evening walk to reset before what feels like a long and isolating night ahead. Find those people that make you feel less alone and are in the moment with you.
Becoming a parent is one of the biggest changes we face in our lives so as much as taking care of yourself is so important, it’s also ok to admit that you’re struggling and not ok. There is support out there if you find yourself struggling, so please please don’t be alone with how you are feeling. Whether this is reaching out to your partner, friends or family, or perhaps reaching out to a professional you trust, please know you are not alone.
Often when we reach out for support to a partner or friends and family, the response is ‘what can I do to help?’. It is worth thinking about what your answer is to this question, and what would be helpful for you? Is that asking for some freezer meals to be made for you so you don’t have to think about cooking for a few evenings, is it about putting dates in your diary with things that you enjoy so you have something to look forwards to, perhaps asking a family member or friend to have your little one for an hour or so, so you to go to that gym class or perhaps just have an hour by yourself to drink your hot cup of tea? What is it that you need and what will help you?
In general, we have found that getting outside every day and moving is really helpful! If you can make time in your day for even a 30 minute walk, this is likely to help clear your mind and enable some time for you to reset. Also be mindful what social media accounts you follow! Again, it’s easy to say but when you’re feeling down and overwhelmed it’s hard to remember..what people share on social media is only a tiny snapshot of their life.
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